A new day is dawning

Something happened to me today, a sudden wash of pride. A feeling that everything has been going just as I thought it would. I know who I am and I know what I will do, but what will those around me do as I attempt leave them in the dust? I'm off to better things; I have modeling to get ready for and that's hard on me as it is; but I do thank all of you who support me, and ALL OF YOU WHO STILL SHOW UP AND READ THIS BUT DON'T COMMENT! Jerks. Anyway; thank you so much; I've replied to all the emails and stuff and Patterson, I believe it was, I will not mention you on my blog, regardless of how big a bag of Hot Tamales was. >__>;

ANYWHO; That's all for now, I have to go have fun with other junk and bother people. If you ever need to reach me, it's best to do it by email~ For those of you who are too lazy to FIND my email; Dazeonae@gmail.com. Have a blast, and remember... I already hate you, so don't get in my way. :\

Letter from the heart

Everyone wants a sign; a non-specific thing or being to pass within their range of vision for even just a brief second; but a sign means nothing if you don't know how to interpret it. The world is full of signs, signals, things telling which direction we should head in, when we should stop, when to go. I'm not talking about driving, I'm talking about life. I myself am waiting for a sign, some... Thing that points me in the direction my heart wants to go, but then I realize that the sign I've been waiting for has been in front of me all along. This wanting to follow my heart is the sign; this yearning for that comforting feeling, my simplistic desires fulfilled, it is all waiting for me. But what if this sign leads me in the wrong direction? What if at the end of this road I find that what I wanted isn't what I can have? Do I wait for another sign, or just make a new one; like I did with the previous? I guess this is to say; don't wait for something to come along and show you where to go; all of the signs are right in front of you, you just need to open your eyes.

I've spent my days pondering about what my next move will be; wondering if stepping out on to thin ice is really a safe thing to do. But I remember that the best moments I had in my life, were the ones when I wasn't thinking. I did what I wanted and it felt wonderful; it was easy to not have regrets because I didn't think about it, but now, there is some that I wish I thought about. And some things that I thought about that I wish I didn't. We're living in a world where you are pummeled with bad news, and how every step you take could be your last, so live life to the fullest; but be cautious and think about it. Mixed emotions for something that I don't have the time to deal with, and neither should you. I feel as though following your heart is doing without thinking, but in itself is all the thinking you need. Every question formed against me will now be answered from the heart; but for those of you who want so many questions answered, ask yourself if you're ready for the answer I might give.

Down but not out

I've done my sulking and sat in my sadness and it's about time I came back. I've got a bunch to share with you all; I suppose it depends on how you view 'a bunch'. First of all; a tidbit of writing that came out of nowhere; I literally just sat down and it spilled out.

The world is spinning, and as I walk this earth, the hearts I touch stand still, but the world is still spinning. I can dig deep and fly high, get lost and never found but this gift will never leave me. I am capable of reaching up and grabbing the stars, bring them back to earth and molding gems, yet all of the treasures in the world aren't enough for the greed I have, I've tossed away so much, giving up so much, but my nature is to take and no matter what I do, it's never enough; and the world keeps spinning. I am truly a king, a right given to a select few by powers unknown to mankind. I am suppose to rule, reign and crush all before my with my righteous hands; and still, regardless of all of this power that has been thrust upon me, there are those who still have powerful effects on me, I can't beat them now. I know I can beat them with time, but my current life prevents that; do I chase after my heart's dream or do I stick with the safety of human bonds and knowledge, clinging to this insignificant life I have? I stand at a mental crossroads, each path laid out by my own shadow; here I stand, time stands still beside me, yet the world is still spinning.

ANYWHO; the news, several good things, and I can't think of any bad things, so... Here we go.'
1) I'm headed off to my next semester at ASU in August, which means those of you who read my blog WITHOUT LEAVING COMMENTS (COUGH COUGH) will get to see me again. Well... Those of you I won't see this summer.

2) There are three tattoo ideas I have only two of which are known by a select few and I may decide to go get them soon. SOUNDS GOOD, RIGHT!? No, it's nothing crazy or dramatic, no tattoo across my face or something, they will be able to be hidden. Erm... Well, sort of. I can hide them if I really don't want people to see them.

3) According to a bunch of my friends and a really freaky/weird adult, I, somewhat, have the potential to be a male model, and thus, starting towards the end of this summer and all through this year at college, I will be an amateur male model which means all of you picture freaks out there will get your fill! GET OFF MY BACK.

4) I got my new glasses a week or so ago! They are thick rimmed glasses that make me look pretty cute actually. It was advice from someone and I don't regret it at all, I look really cute. Of course I'll look better with a hair cut and such; AAANNNDD that brings me to the next thing~

5) I'm thinking of bleaching my hair and possibly dying it blue. My choices are leaving it bleached, bleaching it and dying it blue or cutting it. If I don't cut it, I'll probably get my hair straightened and have gorgeous lengthy hair to wave around. YAY, right!? You can all play in my hair s'more. ♥

6) Terra is a douche-bag who will get thrown at a wall because she's just mean and picks on me too much. Skank. :] <33

7) I don't remember but there actually was something else important; maybe it'll come to me later.

BUT YEAH~ I'M BACK NOW; time to write you people stupid so you can be bored with me again. I love you all; call me when my phone is back on!

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